Cult of Fools Weekly (Apr 28, 2024) – “SCOTUS Immunity Ruling”

MAGA pastor Shane Vaughn held an impromptu prayer session in his car on Thursday to ask God to send angels into the Supreme Court to give former President Donald Trump a victory in his presidential immunity case. What actually happened was not “victory”, and was in many ways a surprise.

The bar of expectations had already been set low, very very low, and yet the Republican justices managed to limbo dance right under it. Under normal circumstances the utterly insane arguments presented by Trump’s lawyers should have resulted in his case going down in flames 9-0, but these are not normal times, because we have a SCOTUS that has bought and paid for.

Elie Mystal, justice correspondent at The Nation expresses wholly appropriate deep shock in a manner that sums it up rather well for many …

The rather interesting twist here, one that the justices might not have fully grasped, is their “logic” Trump could also take out Supreme Court Justices.

What was also truly jaw dropping was Alito’s argument that permitting Trump to be prosecuted for attempting to overthrow the 2020 presidential election would “lead us into a cycle that destabilizes … our democracy,”.

Yes, FFS is indeed the correct response to such utter BS.

Brynn Tannehill sums up their crass stupidity within the New Republic as follows …

These justices’ foolishness lies in their lack of foresight as to what happens if Trump wins in 2024. In the justice’s efforts to ensure that they are the most powerful branch of government, they are about to make it the weakest. They are creating a win-win situation for Trump, and a lose-lose for themselves. When Trump is president again, he is likely to believe that he has the option of “removing” any member of the Supreme Court who defies him. As long as the court doesn’t rule against him, they’re fine. From the justices’ perspective, they either end up neutered lap dogs of a despot, who do whatever they’re told out of fear, or they defy him and end up somewhere … unpleasant (at best). Taking a dirt nap at worst. After all, if Trump can rub out a political opponent, can’t he do the same to an uncooperative jurist?

…If Democrats nearly universally see the court as a corrupt rubber stamp for an autocrat, what happens if Republicans push too far on an issue? Like, say, an effective 50-state ban on abortion from the moment of conception with no real exceptions, which is almost certainly coming despite Republican claims to the contrary. Well, when the court upholds this, or implements it, it becomes highly likely that blue state governments tell the court, and the administration, to go f— yourself.

To put all this another way, the stakes of this already impossibly high-stakes election have just been raised even further.

Samuel Alito is 74. Clarence Thomas is 75. Roberts and Sotomayor are 69. The next president may very well nominate replacements for multiple (if not all!) of these justices. If Trump is elected president next Nov, the Supreme Court is gone for the rest of our lifetimes.

It would mean an all-powerful executive that could commit criminal acts with impunity, a nationwide abortion ban, no restrictions on firearms, a complete dissolution of the Voting Rights Act, election vigilanteism, legalized voter suppression, and so much more.

Some really do grasp the basics …

… and of course as a contrast you can always depend on Fox News to have a crazy take on what is and is not legal for a president …

Moving on, below you will once again find my usual selection of some of the other truly bizarre, deeply weird, and extreme claims that have popped up during the last 7 days. Each is laced with my snarky commentary. 

With my usual hat tip to my various sources, let’s once again dive into this very murky pool of pure absurdity and raw unadulterated stupidity. 

Christian Nationalism

Christian nationalist Tony Perkins tells Christians that they should not be sending their own children to public schools, but “we do need to be sending teachers into the public education system as missionaries because our public schools are as ripe unto harvest as many foreign nations.”

  • Just to make this clear, he does not want their kids going to public schools because the indoctrination would be challenged due to their kids learning how to think critically … but … he does want their folks going in as teachers so that they can then proceed to indoctrinate.
  • To put it another way, yea, he said the quiet part out loud, he wants to keep people ignorant by shoving the bible down throats so that he can carry on grifting.

Sean Feucht says that “we are living in the last days”: “These are the end times … we’re living in the midst of it.”

  • Jesus himself, the guy he claims to follow, very clearly called people like him a liar: “But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven” – Matthew 24:36
  • Quote from Mr Feucht: “Every Christian and person of faith across America should be absolutely horrified at what we’re seeing take place right now on these university campuses that have become hotbeds for antisemitism and hatred of the Jews — an annihilation of an entire nation,” … in other words, his opposition to those opposed to the ongoing Gaza genocide reveals the depths of his moral bankruptcy.

Stephen Wolfe, author of “The Case for Christian Nationalism,” declares that “in places where Christians can assert their will in politics, then they should do that.” And if people don’t like it, well, “tough.”

  • assert their will” = impose their whacky irrational beliefs. In other words, these nutters represent a real threat to us all.

Christian nationalist Ben Zeisloft says that Christians must enact laws for the good of their neighbors, which means “abolishing abortion, outlawing same-sex mirage, ending no-fault divorce, and banning pornography.

  • Here is how this stuff should work: Ben has specific religious rules, so Ben is free to live by those rules.
  • Here is how this stuff should never work: Ben has specific religious rules, so Ben would like to force everybody to live by those rules. That’s basically his pitch here.
  • To fully grasp how nutty it all is, just imagine how pissed Ben would be if Amish or Catholic religious rules were imposed by law upon him. When you get into the game of imposing religious rules, you are setting the stage for religious wars. (European history demonstrates this rather well). The problem is that there is no consensus on what the supposed god wants. Instead we have a vast divergence of conflicting interpretations derived from the ultimate Rorschach test, the Bible.

The Biden Fan Club

Eric Metaxas warns that “Joe Biden is a greater threat to democracy around the world than Vladimir Putin.

  • Being cheer-leader for the guy who literally assassinates his political opponents is not exactly a pro-democracy stance, but hey, what do I know because I’m not an “intellectual” like Mr Metaxas is.
  • Fact-checking is clearly a skill that Mr Metaxes has very studiously avoided

Rudy Giuliani told “prophet” Julie Green that Trump is “a very, very good man” whereas Biden is “a thoroughly evil man”: “Personally, there’s no comparison between [Trump] and the thwarted, almost Satan-like guy in the White House.”

“Apostle” Dutch Sheets, a leading figure within the New Apostolic Reformation, asserts that Democrats who oppose former President Donald Trump are “fighting against the purpose of God for this nation.

  • Anybody claiming the pussy grabber, liar-in-chief, and fraudster is the “Chosen one of God” is using religion to run a very blatant con.
  • The assertion, on the basis of exactly zero evidence, is that opposition to Trump is opposition to God is not actually new. This is simply the old idea of the divine right of kings resurrected. I thought we settled this back in 1776 when we told George III to take his divine right to rule, roll it up very tightly, and then proceed to shove it up his posterior, yet here is this medieval idea alive and well.

Biden made a Trump Bible joke, and Tony Perkins was all over it …

  • Reminder: Tony Perkins is the guy who has dedicated his entire career to ignoring literally everything contained within the Sermon on the Mount.

Christian “Love”

  • The “rod” is the stick you guide the sheep with to move them along. It isn’t a club you beat the sheep with.
  • if you think abusing special needs children is the only way to maintain order, then you really should not become a teacher.


Tucker Carlson went on Joe Rogan and said the theory of evolution has been proven false and supernatural beings in the ocean are killing people.

  • Somebody needs to sit Tucker down and very slowly and carefully break the devastating news to him that Aquaman is not a documentary.
  • National Enquirer now appears to have some serious competition from Tucker.

William Wolfe declares that “the Big Bang Theory and Darwinian Evolution are two of the most laughable concepts ever invented and advanced by modern man”: “If you believe in these, you are, quite literally, a fool in the biblical sense.”

  • But of course “The Big Bang Theory” is laughable, that 12 season TV show was designed to give lots of laughs and I loved it.
  • Meanwhile Mr Wolfe apparently finds the Bible mythology of a 6,000 year old planet Earth that was created by magic, and is far older than the sun and the rest of the universe, to be rather sensible and the best possible answer. Good luck to him with that. #StupidityIncarnate

Even Weirder

Nick Fuentes complains that the conservative movement is dominated by women because they don’t live in fear of being punched, raped, or murdered by men.

Mark Meckler says that Republicans must be prepared to use lawfare against the Democrats: “We should go after our political opponents hard with the DOJ.”

  • Calls for Whacky Activism like this is not new for him, in the past Mr Meckler has not just been a Tea Party nutter, but a tea party founder.
  • Meanwhile, for the “every accusation is a confession” category, we have the actual behaviour of the House Republicans knowingly going after Hunter Biden on the basis of zero credible evidence.

Ben Zeisloft proclaims that “Black America will be re-won for Christ.

  • I have honestly no idea what he is calling for because that demographic is already the most Christian demographic in the country, and most are probably far more faithfully Christian than Mr Zeisloft actually is in practise.

Elijah Schaffer is using his Telegram channel to reveal “the secret on how to have boys when trying to make babies,” declaring that “if you had a girl first, you’re a beta!

  • He basically claims that there are male and female sperm and that the male sperm swim faster. This is the Shettles Method and dates to the 1960s. Interestingly enough it was scientifically debunked by 1982 … yet here it is, so I can only suggest that his “guidance” is a tad late for April 1st.
  • And I thought you had to have have striped sticks visible in the bedroom like it says in Genesis

Also this past week, Elijah Schaffer says he willnever employ females again, or work with them or anything like that” because women are “subversive.”

The False Profit$

Christian nationalist Lance Wallnau told the audience gathered for this “Courage Tour” that they cannot trust anyone but God and “those who God has anointed.” Wallnau, of course, is one of “those who God has anointed” and can therefore be trusted.

  • The word “Christ” comes from the Greek word χριστός (chrīstós), meaning “anointed one“. Listening to these guys running around claiming that they, or Trump, are alternative “Christs”, leads me to seriously wonder if any of their followers ever say to themselves, “Hang on a moment, that’s literally the definition of an alternative Christ, the Anti-Christ“, but apparently not. (Side note: Yea, I’m playing with the religious words Lance has chosen to deploy without any real understanding of what he is actually claiming at all)
  • Meanwhile, I can happily declare that Aphrodite, the goddess of love and fertility, has anointed me to send you the good news that these guys are all talking BS, that you can happily ignore all these hate-filled grifters, and that you can instead embrace all of humanity. (My anointing has exactly the same credibility as his, except I’ve got a far better message than this grifter).
  • Am I being unfair calling Lance a grifter? Well, you be the judge, because here he is hawking Trump “gold” coins on the Jim Bakker show. And yes, that’s Trump “Gold”, it is not real gold at all, just a few cents worth of gold-plating on a worthless bit of zinc. It has no real value at all. The $45 is basically a Stupidity Tax.

Praying Medic and QAnon fanatic Dave Hayes, who repeatedly predicted that the military would take over the country and put former President Donald Trump back in office, is now warning that the Biden administration is trying to impose martial law.

  • His “logic” works like this. He is really pissed about the Trump being held accountable for his crimes and also is deeply pissed by the observation that the Biden Administration is not oppressing people for the “crime” of being gay. He “thinks” this is all part of a big Biden conspiracy to force him and his fanatical buddies to take up arms and thus enable the military to take control.
  • Reminder 1: His wet dream during the Trump administration was for Trump to use the military to take control permanently.
  • Reminder 2: Literally everything he “predicted” concerning QAnon never happened.

Kent Christmas, yes that is his real name, demonstrates that being a “prophet” is the easiest job in the world because even when the thing you prophesied would happen doesn’t, you just insist that it did.

  • Prophecy 101: If the thing you predict does not happen, then find some way to simply claim it has happened. One standard play is to claim it happened on a spiritual level.
  • In this case he points out that he predicted that Trump would win in 2020, then uses the big lie to assert that he was correct because the election was then “stolen”.
  • I’m shocked I tell you shocked … to find a religious fraudster deploying the big lie to support the liar-in-chief.
  • All the red flags are in play – Product-heavy hair, check. Aggressive level of tan, check. Expensive but hideous wardrobe, check. Unwieldy ego, check.
  • The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.” – George Orwell, 1984

Self-proclaimed “prophet” Cindy Jacobs and “The Apostolic Council of Prophetic Elders” held an emergency livestream last night so Jacobs could tearfully deliver a warning from God that the Gaza protests are an insurrection aimed at establishing an Islamic state in North America.

  • This is not just your ordinary everyday bullshit, but instead is gold-plated Olympic-Class Bullshit. Delusional religious fanaticism has let to both Hamas and also the Netanyahu regime committing atrocities and mass slaughter. You might assume that reality would be sufficient to give everybody else some pause about supporting any of them, but apparently not for these guys. They are demanding the right to endorse the Genocides-R-Us faction for fanatical religious reasons and want to trample all over any who dare to suggest that supporting mass murderers might not be a good idea.
  • Irony Alert: They are terrified that others might attempt to impose religious rules by force because they want to have an exclusive monopoly on imposing their specific variation of religious rules by force.

Sending Your Tax dollars to Private Schools

NC is not doing so well …

… meanwhile over in Tennessee they are doing a lot better and successfully tossed this BS out …

Protesting Genocide

If you think things are bad on US campuses these days, then pause and consider why they are protesting and how things actually are on campus in Gaza …

4 Years ago Reminder

An offer for Moscow Marjorie

Statistic of the Week

Now here is a fascinating measurable response to Abortion Bans …

Most people really do love dogs

So yes, Kristi Noem has an account of her killing own dog in her new book. It provoked quite a few reactions.

WH Correspondents Dinner

Biden: “Donald has had a few tough days lately, you might call it Stormy Weather” …

…The guy who took your abortion rights away is a NY playboy, and the guy who is trying to give you those rights back is an 80 years old Catholic, how does that make sense?“…

Yes, you want to watch all of Colin Jost’s speech now … so here you go …


They inerviewed them both …

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