Scientists pledge to increase interference with the Church


Scientists_pledge_to_increase_interference_with_the_Church___Dean_Burnett___Science___The_GuardianOooh this sounds exciting, Dean Burnett, a doctor of neuroscience, writes in the UK’s Guardian all about an exciting new initiative that involves scientists interfering in the daily affairs of religion.

So why are they doing this?

Well because …

The Catholic Church and Church of England have recently been urging MPs to vote against the introduction of mitochondrial donation, a potentially life-saving procedure with little to no evidence of any serious risks. However, despite many years of study and several regulations, the aforementioned churches have surprisingly decided to intervene and urge MPs to vote against approving the procedure

This has lead to much criticism, especially from scientists.

… and so now it is time to reciprocate …

The Federation for Furthering Science (FFS) has promised to intervene with any and all religious issues it can find that could benefit from some “scientific perspective”. 

Dr Hugh Briss, spokesperson for FFS, explained the motivation for this policy.

“While they’re often at each other’s throats in other countries like the US, in the UK religion and science have mostly maintained an uneasy peace, largely by both ignoring whatever the other is doing (with some notable exceptions).

“But this interjection in approving a procedure that’s been extensively studied and refined by world-leading experts over several years on very questionable grounds? Well, that’s what we call a “bad precedent”. So if representatives of the churches are allowed to do that, then logically we as representatives of science are allowed to do the same?

Now least you wonder and still don’t get it, let me spell it out …

  • What other well-know anglo-saxon phrase can be abbreviated with the acronym FFS?
  • The chap mentioned … Hugh Briss … sound out his name

Yes, the article is of course satire, and so nobody would be daft enough to seriously consider such a move.

It’s funny and yet at the same time, a rather serious point is also being made.

Why oh why are adults who have an imaginary friend being granted a privileged position in the UK to interfere in scientific progress? They have exactly zero scientific expertise and clearly demonstrated that they do not fully grasp the issues being debated

Meanwhile back at the FFS …

“I’ve already produced a new version of the Bible that leaves out anything that can’t be 100% confirmed by science. It’s much more streamlined now, which is handy as you can fit it all on a postcard and mail it to people, rather than going door-to-door” 

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